May 29, 2009

Taylor Swift and personal philosophies

Taylor Swift's album make a girl want to go through the heartbreak and torture of a break up just so you can listen to her songs and fully, entirely, completely relate to the lyrics.  I can't stop listening and it's weird because the writing is so true yet so unrelateable (word? not a word? who cares) for me at this point in my life.  Basically I love her?   Yeah.  That's what I want to say.

I was looking up quotes online - quite a passion of mine, actually - and I read one about love.  It said "Love someone and be loved in return."  I started to think about how true that one simple quote is.  In high school, I remember performing in a play and the director (Mr. KARASEK for anyone remembers him!!!) was like "I need you all to feel the pain of being in love with someone who isn't in love with you."  And I was like um, what?  I was 16 for crying out loud.  I hadn't even had my first boyfriend yet.  The only response he could solicit was from me, saying, "But why love someone if they don't love you back?" And he just gave me this weird smile and responded with "because you can't help to love someone even if they don't return the love back."  It was weird.  And for awhile I didn't understand it, I thought frankly he was stupid for saying that and even a tad bit pathetic because why love someone who doesn't feel the same way?  I feel there has to be a reason to feel love for someone, and one of them for me personally it to feel loved in return.  
 I grew up and I started to think maybe you could love someone but not be loved back.  And that kind of freaked me out too.  But then I read that quote and it all made sense - perhaps the people I thought I loved, I didn't.  I can say honestly to all of you internets people that I have only told three out of the four serious boyfriends I have had that loved them.  With one it was pretty damn clear that love was not a part of the relationship (clear as day, yet still blinded while in the relationship).  And out of the three boyfriends,  it is clear who truly cared for me and who didn't.  I think love really is something that can only be felt if reciprocated by the other party.  I don't love Justin Timberlake because let's be honest, he wouldn't remember me if I approached him today (not to mention he does have that woman who is constantly with him).  And I didn't love some guys in my life because clearly they weren't loving me back.  And by love I mean complete an total respect, consideration and appreciation for the other person.  The object of dating someone is not to tear them down but to build them up.  If it works out, great!  If not, oh well.  I'm not a dating doctor nor to I claim to be perfect or all-knowing on the subject but really, you can care for someone - you can hope they are okay, happy, healthy, safe, etc. - but it doesn't necessarily mean it's love.  

Then what about "love heard around the world?"  and what about God loving people who don't love him?  Well a) love for others is called compassion.  duh.  b) God is God.  Hello! He's the man.  He breaks all barriers, he is almighty, he is not even comparable to this human situation right now.  He is a major component of love, but he loves everyone even though some refuse to accept it.  

I wouldn't day I am in denial either.  Before, when I would break up with boyfriends (and it wasn't necessarily me doing the breaking-up), I was consider myself starting from a clean slate.  That meaning that if I loved the next guy I was with, I was never was truly in love in the first place.  I felt you could only love one person, that person being the one who you end up with forever.  Now I feel differently - that you are only in love once, in love meaning the greatest love of your life, but the act of loving someone is repetitive.  Maybe I'll change my mind again once I grow up some more.

Anyway, funny how a Taylor Swift song and a quote can get me going on a tangent like this.  I'd love to hear other's opinions but thought I'd share my view.  It is my blog after all!

Off to play on Garage Band.  

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