Jun 30, 2009

Celebs, tiny things and star signs

For some reason, I haven't mentioned the thing most of you people come here to read about: celebrities!!! So here we go.

Last Friday, I was walking downstairs in the salon to get our next airbrush client, Laura. I get to the bottom of the stairs, round the corner and see a young woman with big hair and start to walk towards her thinking it was Laura. I was about to ask her if she was here for an airbrush tan until I got about two inches away from her and realized it was none other than Audrina Patridge.

Um, definitely not Laura. Luckily I backed away before she noticed and things got real awkward. She was extremely beautiful in person and didn't make a huge scene.

It must have been celeb day because not an hour later Janice Dickinson walked in. I couldn't believe it. First of all, she's just as you'd expect: loud and in charge. She's fun. She's in wonderful shape and I was really impressed with how good she looks. She's very tan after returning from the jungle. And, lastly, she's kind. I was nervous because I didn't know how to react to her but she was very polite and introduced herself to me. Today she came in again and hung out and was a hoot. She brought us chocolates and lounged around while getting her hair done. She even hugged me! What a doll. I love her.

ON to tiny things. Starbucks just came out with new gift cards - keychain size! ahhh! I love this!!! I'm obsessed with Starbucks and I constantly have a gift card on me (thanks to Uncle Rog - he understands my obsession. BTW, follow him on Twitter, @RogerClemens). So imagine my complete delight when I got an e-mail about the new baby cards!!!! No more worrying about if I brought my Starbucks card along in my wallet - it's on my keys. Precious!

Lastly, in college I took an introductory astronomy class and although I hated it with all my heart, I learned that what we think our astrological sign is is probably wrong. We used this astronomy program in one of our labs to chart where the sun was (or something) on that exact date and time we were born. Apparently, I am really a sagitarrius and not a capricorn, although I am considered a cappy by standards these days. I have a mix of traits from both signs so I figure I'm a Capricarrius. :) You can find out what you are (and compare) at this site since I can't remember the actual program:


That's all. Off to work a cocktail party! xo.

Jun 29, 2009


First all, Princess Protection Program is letting me down terribly. Come on, Disney! Selena should have been the princess, Demi the loner. Don't try to push the alternate universe sham on me! It's not working.

Second, I have been TRYING to make a custom header for my portfolio. The dimensions have to be 770 x 140 pixels and I cannot for the life of me get mine to upload without it looking pixelated; when I do, it only appears as a "?" mark. Can anyone guide me on this issue? I'm using photoshop and I need help!

Thanks in advance.

Music Monday

Okay. I know I did this on Friday, but according to Twitter it's #Music Monday. So I've decided to let you all in on some of my favorites covers!

1. Change, T.Pain, Akon, Mary J. Blige, Diddy
You know you've become universal when your song is remade by the rap crew. I can't help but laugh everytime I hear T.Pain start singing "If I Could Change the World" after Diddy's intro because seriously, this version is so far from the original... it's like Christina Aguilera from 1998 - now. Do yourself a favor and download it because it's actually really catchy.

2. Lose Your Love, Katy Perry
Originally by The Outfield, Katy's version appeared on Perez Hilton circa 2007 and I fell in love. First of all, I'm a seriously huge 80s fan. If a club plays 80s, you can be I'll be there all the time. Second, this prepared me for Katy and my soon-to-be obsession with her.

3. I Think that she Knows, John Mayer
You can't actually download this song, but it's lovely to listen to. John covers JT's Lovestoned/I Thanks That She Knows interlude and it's amazing to watch him play it. It also sounds amazing. A nice performance of my favorite part of that song... it's so euphoric to listen to that I'd call it a religious experience.

4. Time After Time, Quietdrive
This song was the soundtrack to my life at one point. I listened to it on repeat, it was my ringtone - to this day I can't skip over it when it appears on shuffle. I think it was publicized in "John Tucker Must Die" but I've never seen it so I can't vouch. But the song puts a nice spin on the Cyndi Lauper Classic.

5. Girls Just Want to Have Fun, Greg Laswell/Miley Cyrus
Speaking of Cyndi, you can't think of her without thinking of Girls Just Want to Have Fun. It's an anthem, really, so I love hearing new covers. Greg's isn't so much new - it premiered on The Hills a few years ago. Miley covered hers on "Breakout", her first solo album, and I love love love the strings that are going on.

Jun 28, 2009

BET Coverage

-Opening tribute: Who are these people? They are doing a TERRIBLE job. When I saw *NSYNC back in 1999 they did a tribute to MJ and they actually sang and danced well. I know this is the BET awards but they could have invested in some whities.

-Why is Jeremy Piven at this?!!!

-Is this going to be a whole MJ show? I mean the man just died three days ago and everyone is almost mocking the fact that he's dead. I don't know how I feel about it.

-Why are they not announcing all of the nominees!????? This is chaotic. They really must have thrown this all together. Not trying to knock Michael, but this is getting a little out-of-control. They should have kept the show's stability and added a few tribute performances... not a million of them. I don't think he would have wanted it to result in all of this.

-Um, Lebron: what exactly did the Jacksons do for basketball?! I mean let's get real, the power of their music didn't revolutionize the game. Just say your condolences and move on.

-Kerri Hilson is wonderful. I wish Ne-Yo and Kanye sang "Knock You Down" with her though.
- She must have had to change up her entire performance because I guarantee she wasn't going to be incorporating an MJ outfit and dance moves into it before his passing. This is insane.

... Just kidding. Ne-Yo is doing a tribute to Michael. I love him. He can actually sing and he sounds delicious as well.

-Is that JOE JACKSON?! You've got to be kidding me!!!! Your kid just died! This is ridiculous. Whatever, maybe that's how he's going to heal. I'm just not sure most people would do it at an awards show.

-Maybe this should be the Michael Entertainment Television awards and all the awards should go to Mike. Seriously.

-This girl kicked some butt singing but I still don't know who she is.

-T.PAIN!!!!!!! I love me tom TizzlePizzle. Jamie Foxx, eh.

-I'd love to go to one of these BET award after parties. I bet people get crazy. And frankly? I think I could fit in with the rappers.

-Um what is Snoop Dogg doing? Please stop.

-This entire song is a backing track. Nothing sounds live. Except right now during the chorus when it sounds horrible.

-AHAHA dude I love T.Pain so much. This guy plays into his persona. I totally want to meet him...

-Soulja Boy Tell 'Em... you are terrible. Please stop. And why is the visual all weird now?!

-Best Collaboration? T.Pain and Jamie Foxx. Who did they beat out? Oh wait we'll never know because THEY DIDN'T ANNOUNCE THE OTHER NOMINEES.

-When I win an award (for something), the first thing I'll do is Thank God. And then the haters. Just like T.Pain.

-Best RB Performer: Ne-Yo. Amen. I swear, I love his style so much. If I have a child, I hope he's black and dresses just like him. - Update, Val suggests I name the kid Ne-Yo or Yo-Ne. And no, I don't think I'm going to have a black kid by osmosis.

-Beyonce, oh baby. She's the ideal woman performer. Check her out! A singing wonder, a beautiful face and bangin' bod. Ave Maria, what a beautiful song. I'm glad she's not singing an MJ song. She sounds impeccable singing In The Arms of the Angel. I understand why she's incorporating it. Subtle but beautiful. I am a little bored.

-Some hoe on Twitter just told me that the reason I don't understand how the Jacksons influenced basketball was because I'm white. Um, hello?! I want to say something. First of all, how can black people get away with making comments like that to white people but when a white person says things like that we're racist?! I am not racist in the the slightest. Racism is pretty much something that has never affected my life. However, don't tell me that based on my skin color that I don't understand things. Michael Jackson did nothing for the basketball industry or the game. His music and lyrics didn't heal everything and create a great game, he didn't unify anyone in that industry with his music. His dance moves didn't improve a three-pointer. His style didn't influence a change in the uniform. It might have affected those people personally but it didn't revolutionize the game, so get that straight. I would throw out some basketball greats who did influence the game but honestly I don't know enough about the sport to throw those names out, except for maybe the other MJ, Michael Jordan.

-Um what is going on?! "She's in the ladies room?" Could you not have said anything more graceful than that? Awkward.

-I'm still mad about that tweet. What the heck? What entitles her to make this a race issue? Because I'm white. Psshh. Seriously, that was so absurd.

-Best New Artist: Keri Hilson! Whoop!

-OMG Keith Sweat is on here right now. This is happening. Where is Stewart?! He would love this.

-Again, why is Jeremy Piven here?

-It's nice to hear all of the great things Michael done and how he has influenced everyone, but I can't help but feel a little sad that people would not have said these things about him four days ago. In fact, they would have probably contributed to the media scrutiny and maybe made a few jokes at his expense.

- Okay. I can't handle this any longer. It's been fun.

Tribute to MJ

Val threatened to post this if I didn't stop talking about my eyebrows. Clearly I haven't. However, I am not ashamed because this video depicts two central aspects of me: combining choreographed dances moves into everyday life and strict skin care regimens.


Hope everyone takes the time to have a few dance offs to MJ in the next few days.

Jun 27, 2009

Eyebrows: The Evolution

Now that I've gotten more psychotic about the eyebrow issue, I've decided to chronicle my brows over the years. I apologize to Val and Stu for having to endure me during these trying times because I really am a baby about it. Case and point? Easter weekend, I had lightened my brows. Stu tells me they're too light. Great. So I go buy dye to make them darker and it literally couldn't have gone any more wrong. I looked like Groucho Marx (shown above). Luckily that was fixed.

So here's my eyebrow evolution. We've come a long way, friends.
junior year of high school

senior year of high school

freshman year of college!!! oh my sweet baby Jesus. I cannot BELIEVE I let myself look like that!!!!!

sophomore year

junior year debauchery in the bathroom. Note: wearing body suits can result in difficult bathroom trips

senior year

right now

So yeah. I'm having issues with the brows. But one day (more like 30 days) I'll be back to normal.

Valentina and my eyebrows


Today I got my eyebrows shaped. I haven't waxed them in years because I haven't needed to, just tweezed. And although they are shaped nicely, I miss my old brows. However, Valentina didn't even notice anything was done to them, so I guess I'm anxious about absolutely nothing. I feel the same about going lighter with me hair. I am neurotic.

Val, you're not going to hear the end of this eyebrow issue until they grow back in and according to extensive internet research it will be about a month of me wee-wahing :)

Jun 26, 2009

For Your Viewing Pleasure

I'm a woman and I have no issues admitting when other ladies are fine, fine, fine. Maxim always comes out with a Hot 100 list but I have to say about 99% of the time I don't agree with anything they say because let's be honest here, when was the last time Jennifer Love Hewitt did something legitimate with her career? And Lindsay Lohan? I mean, yes, they're hotties, but they need to be relevant - and not just for who they date or their latest escapade.

So I'm going to sing the praises of several women each week. I'll include photos for all of you frisky types.

Megan Fox(y)... meow.

Yeah, you knew she'd be on here. I really can't stop looking at her. I don't think I'd be able to be friends with her either. How can you be friends with something that beautiful? Anyway, she's a total babe with a "kick ass" mentality and I like that. I also like how she is reaching out to "yellow rose boy," the kid who was trying to give her a rose but was unsuccessful. Luckily for him, mainstream media captured the whole debacle and now he's getting to meet Megan up close and personal.

Katy Perry

Okay, so maybe I have a thing for blue-eyed brunettes, possibly because when I was born my Mom wanted me to look like that (wasn't even close to happening. Sorry Mom). Anyway, I have loved Katy Perry since her cover of "Lose Your Love" by The Outfield was released and have been hooked ever since. I don't like "I Kissed a Girl" at all, but I'll let that one slide because the song "Hot 'N' Cold" is on my 10 Songs I Could Listen to on Repeat list and the Waking Up in Vegas video is spot-on. I totally want to design some outfits for her because who doesn't like a good romper or hot pant? :)

Isla Fisher

I love a hot ginger (Prince Harry, anyone?), so I had to had Isla to the list. She's a hottie even after having a baby! Not to mention she is committed to partner Sacha Baron Cohen, who everyone will be enjoying this summer in Bruno (out July 10). I think it says a lot of Isla to deal with a comedian. She must have a lot of patience and a fun-loving side. Cheers to you Isla!

Cameron Diaz

Who doesn't love Cammie D? What a complete babe. A girl's girl and a guy's girl, she's completely accessible to anyone. I love her big grin, bigger laugh and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't envious that she used to date Justin Timberlake. My Sister's Keeper, her film debuting today in theaters, is based on the best-selling novel. I think this will be one of the first roles we'll see her in as an older, maternal figure and not the fun, partying-hard girlfriend we're used to. When I think of summer, Cameron usually comes to mind.

Emma Watson

Miss Watson rounds out our list. She's the youngest but she has a brain - Emma was accepted to Ivy Leagues such as Yale and Brown but will actually enroll in Columbia this coming fall for undergrad studies. With Harry Potter's sixth installment coming out July 15th, you have to give her props for still wanting to pursue anything other than entertainment at such a young age.

Music Matters Friday

Alright. You're getting two posts today! Woo hoo! The first is about to be some music downloads I recommend. If you're a male reading this, I can't promise you'll actually like this music because it's mostly pop. But divulge anyway.

New sounds

Drake, Best I Ever Had
I can't figure out if he is the protege to Lil Wayne or just a wannabe, but Aubrey "Drake" Graham got his start on Degrassi: The Next Generation and I can't complain about that! You might also recognize Drake because of his most recent fling with Princess Rihanna.

Demi Lovato, Here We Go Again
I LOVE me some Demi Lovato. Something about her voice; it's not naisily, it's not autotuned (entirely), it's not talk-singing - it's wonderful! Probably the only Disney Star that can actually belt it out besides Miley (because as annoying as she can be, Miley can carry a tune). This is her new single the chorus rocks, it's reminiscent of a bit of Kelly Clarkson, Paramore and Katy Perry. Not bad if I do say so myself. It'll be stuck in your head in no-time.

Valentina MitZkat, Glorious
I can't say enough good things about this next artist. Maybe I'm partial - she is my roommate, after all. But I'm lucky enough to have someone I live with play music I actually like! I'm pretty much her demographic so if you and I have similar taste in music I guarantee you'll like her. Val's music isn't on iTunes yet but be sure to visit her page at www.myspace.com/ValentinaMitzkat. Come on, Come on. Her voice reminds me at times of Celine Dion and a lot of her up-tempo sounds have a Killers vibe, a little Robyn as well. She writes beautiful ballads and I hope soon she will record and put up a new song she wrote just this week, "Kiss You Better."

Cash Cash, Party in Your Bedroom
If you want some feel-good music, go directly to Cash Cash. I always listen to it on my way out on Friday and Saturday nights. Very synth, a little punk at times and definitely alternative, they make good use out of the auto-tune but it works for them. If you like this single, download Sugar Rush as well.

Black Eyed Peas, Missing You and Imma Be
A great dance/party album, The E.N.D. is throwing out singles left and right. My personal favs are Missing You, which reminds me of early 90s dance grooves like Real McCoy's "Another Night" or even Ace of Base's "The Sign." I love Imma Be just for Fergie's verses at the beginning... she's so sassy!

Alright. Hope I've given you some good jams for the weekend. I have to go figure out why the cat is acting like she's on speed.

Jun 25, 2009

When it's all said and done

When it's all said and done, what kind of impact will you have left on the people who knew you? I think that Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson both left a wonderful legacy of themselves to their fans. There will never be a poster as a great as Farrah's. Nobody will sha-mon, dance, sing and groove like Mr. Jackson.

I feel so terrible for all parties involved. I'm sure a lot of the family members heard of these tragedies through the radio, internet or TV: isn't it a shame that the human race has become so media hungry that we're dying to see the final photograph of dying people? It's rather disgusting. But I guess I can understand it. It's kind of like closure in a sense because a lot of fans won't get to attend a funeral, and although they aren't entitled to go, a lot of people feel as if they know these celebrities on a personal level. Maybe seeing a "final photograph" is a way to make it real. Regardless, it's still sad that celebrities aren't entitled to the privacy of a normal person - even during their own death.

I also would like to ask for a lot of you to unfollow Perez Hilton on Twitter. I am going to choose not to speak about him further after this, but I want people to know the destructive, sick and preposterous behavior he has displayed this week. Again, as I've said before, how does being gay and calling someone a f*ggot even begin to sound legitimate? Then, today, while trying to figure out if Michael Jackson really was dead or not (there was speculation all over Twitter), there was a post about MJ and how "ticket holders should get their money back" because Michael was probably creating another publicity stunt to avoid his upcoming string of concerts, basically insinuating he was fabricating his death. This has gone extremely too far and many other celebrities have had enough of it as well. This man cannot keep going through life expecting to take stabs at other people and their personal lives and then turning around once they finally die and pretend like he's some sort of Saint with love, compassion and empathy. If he was, he would show those emotions on a daily basis and NOT just for the hot up-in-coming acts. Maybe he really does have empathy for others, but it's hard not to feel as if those feelings a merely attempts to be the first person to report something and gain publicity for his own selfish ego.

Anyway, I hope that previous paragraph didn't outshine the point I am trying to make tonight. Celebrities, though flawed (like everyone else), are people. They live, they die. They make dumb mistakes and they might do weird things. They might do wonderful things. They might change the world. But at the end of the day, when you die, you have to think about who and what you're leaving behind and both Farrah and MJ shouldn't have anything to worry about. God bless them both.

You learn to Swerve

Tonight was just like any other night. Not really. But I was planning to attend a 21st birthday and I have to say I know how to buy for the birthday of all birthdays. If you're ever hurting for a gift, I'd recommend some kind of nice cocktail shaker (they'll appreciate it) and some freezeable ice cube shot glasses. Pretty self-explanatory: just fill the mold with water, freeze & set, and then use for shot glasses. Fun, right? I always like to throw in something not so ridiculous and realistic, like a business card holder, just to remind people "Hey, you might be old enough to get drunk at a bar, but you're also old enough to start conducting yourself like a professional." Business in the front, party in the back.

I returned home around 2:45 after hitting up The Roosevelt. We literally broke in and I'm not even kidding. Emily, a new friend, started yelling, "girls! hurry! seriously!" and we ran around the corner to this random door which, I kid you not, she literally pulled the door unlocked and we ran in. Lucky us because they weren't letting anyone in. I felt so rebellious! Anyway, back at home, I decided to freak out Ali and Val a little by telling them I got t-boned in my car by Katy Perry, Val's semi-but-not-so-much-arch-nemesis. I got the exact reaction I wanted and then told them it was a big fat fib. They weren't too thrilled.

Then, somehow, we got on the subject of dating people we love. For instance, Ali had a fantasy about dating Prince Harry and the headlines announcing it as "When Harry Met Ali." Clever, my friend. This turned into how I will marry Justin Timberlake. My mom has always been supportive of this dream (minus the Janet Jackson fiasco) and she has always told me anything is possible. Exhibit A? John Travolta and Kelly Preston. Kelly was just a girl who loved John in Saturday Night Fever. Now they're married. Kevin Bacon and his wife were in the same boat.

Let me sidetrack a minute. You know what? I don't think I've ever heard from anyone, "Kirbie, you can't do that." I really don't think I have. Anything I have wanted to do or pursue in my life... I've never been told it wasn't possible. Maybe it's luck, maybe it's by chance - maybe that streak is about to end soon. I don't know. I do know that's thanks to my parents and family, however, and why I feel anything is truly achievable.

Back on track: so as we're talking about JT and our big dreams for ourselves, Val mentions the movie "My Date With Drew." It is the newest movie to enter my Top 10 Best Movies in the "Wield" (world) list. It's a documentary about a broke man who has a harmless crush on Drew Barrymore (and has since he was 10) and has 30 days, a loaned camera and $1100 to document his adventure and to actually land a date with Miss Barrymore herself. It reminded me of how I felt when I'd go to *NSYNC concerts when I was younger and the anxious excitement I had while being there; that something magical was going to happen and that something bigger was going on outside of my life in Georgetown, Texas. I teared up at this movie and it sounds so idiotic but it's rather inspiring. Someone in the movie gave these words of wisdom to Brian at the start of his search for Drew: "Well, you're in Hollywood, a place where dreams come true and not just in movies."

Anyway, things are getting tight right now. I need to have a full-time job by mid-August so hopefully something works out. I appreciate everyone thoughts, prayers, e-mails, site views, messages, follows on twitter... it helps me to feel a little bit at home in a new place.

It's almost 5:00 now and I need to go to bed. Night!

Jun 23, 2009

Romance in Comedy

Well I should have posted this on Sunday, but whatever. I'm a person big on dates. Not like going out, but calendar-dates. For instance, Sunday was a year since Stewart and I shared our first kiss! I can hear you all "aww-ing" right now. Ironic that our first kiss was before our first date - which is a first in itself. Anyway, I feel compelled to share our moment because it's really a great story. And Stu is so proud of himself.

It was a Saturday, and I was invited out with my friend Blaine for a round of pub golf. I didn't actually participate but I wanted to go out and get some human interaction since my life at that point consisted of sitting at the end of a long table during the day and going home to no one at night (my roommate was in her hometown for the summer). Blaine mentioned her brother was coming into Fort Worth because he was moving into Dallas soon and that he was coming out with friends, and "his friends are hot," so I figured it was a necessary outing.

We were at that one bar by Pete's... not The Library... Fox and Hound? I don't know. Regardless, a guy walked in and I told Blaine, "Man, he's hot." Her response? "Um, that's my brother." Then she gave me a good Blaine laugh. Whoops!

Stu and I introduced ourselves to each other and pretty much tried to avoid each other all night. Before you know it we were bar hopping and ended up a The Pour House. The Space Rockers were playing - a great cover band - and I was running around desperately trying to find a business card (always being social chair...) when I noticed there were about eight bachelorette parties going on. Having a few too many drinks at this point, I made an odd decision when one group approached me.

"My sister is engaged!" One girl said.
"Oh, really? ME TOO!"
She immediately eyeballs my ring finger. "Really? Congrats! Where's your ring?"
Crap. I had on two rings, one being a cross ring from James Avery; the other a blue & white diamond ring that was a gift from my parents.
"Oh, well, he can't really afford one right now. But he gave me this one (the diamond) for Christmas and this ring symbolizes my faith."
At this point a man has joined. "I hate to tell you, but you're not engaged."
"Why would you say that?!"
"You look too young to be getting married."
I knew this was going to get tough. I needed to bring out the big guns. At this point Blaine is dying because she has no idea why I'm making up such an intricate story - so she walks over to tell Stu what was going on.
"Well, you don't have to believe me, Sir, but my fiance is right over there. You can ask him." I point to Stu, who is standing at the bar and has two drinks in his hand.
"Yeah right," say the guy.
Stu looks at me kind of in shock. I knew he wouldn't play along, so I was about to give in and confess - UNTIL Stu walks towards me, bends down and give me a kiss, smack-dab on the lips.

"Hi. This is my fiance and we're getting married soon."

Blaine is rolling. I'm not speaking. Stu is smiling. The couple bought it.
"Well, congrats. Get her a proper ring." They walk off.

"Sorry about that... I hope that was okay," says Stu.
"No worries! That was awesome!"

I think Blaine might have given him a high-five. And then he made out with another girl that night. Just kidding! That was the ongoing joke. But anyway, obviously things worked out for the better. I love telling that story and so does he, but it's going to get to a point where it's going to get awkward to talk about how we were engaged before we even started dating. hahaha.

Love you Stu-babis.

Let me break it down here

Alright. This is going to be a tirade of all tirades. I'm putting on my "Jirby" hat right now. Jirby is my new alter-ego that was born on Saturday night. It's what Val and Ali call me when I do something weird or get grouchy. So welcome Jirby because the fighting words are about to commence. (By the way... Jirby is spelled with a "Y" because she is completely separate from Kirbie.)

Things that really have irritated me the past two days:

Hello, Perez Hilton. Last time I checked, fighting for gay rights and then calling people "f*ggots" (your word, not mine) is the most ridiculous oxymoron I have EVER heard. The fact that you would call someone something like that, as a gay man, to provoke another human being is absurd. It's gross. It's so disgusting that I hope you are ashamed of yourself, and you know what? I don't condone violence but let's be honest here - you had it coming. When you spend your life discussing how ugly you think people are or gossiping about the latest breakup, you deserve it when things start going downhill. I like when you bring your readers new music to listen to or updates to castings; I like it when you post photos of celebs doing their thing. But some of the commentary is atrocious and I'm actually kind of surprised you weren't decked sooner. Now, I'm not a promoter of any type of violence. But I think that includes words, because words can hurt, bruise, sting and cut just as much as physical touch can.

I'm also shocked that you would use such language after causing so much of a ruckus about Miss California and her view of legalizing gay marriage. Her views might be discriminatory, but let's remind ourselves that she never said anything derogatory or hateful about the gay community. Yet you, as a homosexual, have. Isn't that ironic?

And also, how about next time you get in trouble like that you actually act like a civilized human being and call the cops yourself instead of tweeting about it on Twitter. I think John Mayer said it best when he called you a "dumbsh*t."

Enough about Perez. He's probably feeling guilty enough.

Now on to Joe Jonas. Dear Joe, last time I checked, it probably wasn't the best idea to talk and harp on ex-girlfriends when you have a new one. For instance, we all know a song on the new album is about T. Swift. That's fine - especially since Taylor wrote one about you - but changing the lyrics so they're even more specific (instead of "I'm done with super stars" he changed it to "I'm doing with country stars") is lame. I'm sorry that Taylor gave it to you good on her press tour for Fearless when she frequently discussed the 30-second phone call. But guess what? She wasn't a tool and discussing it with a new boyfriend in tow! Please get a grip on life. Sing your songs, wear your tight pants, wear your hair too long and move on.

Alright. Those are my tirades for the day. Life is good. I have a new phone and I'm working on getting my priorities in order. Talk soon.


Jun 22, 2009


Most people consider Texas Chainsaw Massacre, The Exorcist and The Shining scary movies. Well add Alice in Wonderland to the list, because this movie scares the bejeezus out of me.  I literally can't watch more than two minutes of it.  Everything is so strange and everyone is so "off"... I just can't handle it.  So you can guess that I was traumatized when I was scoping out Perez today and got a view of these photos:  

First of all, haven't there already been ENOUGH translations, renditions and remakes of this terrifying free-for-all?! I can barely even look at Johnny Depp.  Yes, that's him on the left.  I seriously have issues with AIW, ever since I was a child.  That movie is everything all of my worst nightmares consist of.  A little girl, alone, running around and trying to find her way while people mislead her, misdirect her, scare her; she grows, she shrinks, she cries.  She meets strange people who act like they're on crack.  Not to mention her head is threatened to be chopped off.  I was just telling my mom how I had severe anxiety when she took me on the AIW ride at DisneyLand in third grade, and now THIS?!  I'll probably go see it though because I'm totally into freaking myself out.  

So my iPhone is officially iDead.  The screen, although still viewable, doesn't let me use the touchscreen.  If you try to reach me, that's why you can't.  I'll be getting a phone soon though - I can't run around this town without a phone.  :)

That's about it for today.  Just living life out here... hope all is well.

So here's where you come in

For the love, respond to my blog.  I can see that people are viewing it, but nobody is responding!  It gets dull not getting feedback (Mom, you respond so exclude yourself from this).  Like if I became a producer of sitcom, I'd definitely be someone who needed an in-studio audience.  I know they're cued to laugh, but go with it.  What I'm trying to say is that I need some verification that people actually metaphorically "laughing," moreso reading and thus responding.

Don't like something?  Tell me!  Do like something?  Write me!  Have a suggestion about something I should blog about?  Have any tips or advice about blogging, my website, the entertainment industry, management, producing, agents, movie studios (you get the the point)?  Let me know!  My blog is sadly a way I get to express myself out in a place where friends are minimal right now, although my friend-base has expanded and grown within the past few days!  

Gotta go to bed before I have a case of the Mondays tomorrow.


Jun 21, 2009

You look like a Yorkie

On Friday I was at the salon when Christopher, one of the hairstylists, looks at me and goes, "OH my GOD, Kirbie, I just LOVE the color of your hair! You look like a Yorkie!" Um, red flags noted. Time for a-sprucening up. I went to Edward, the King of Blondes here at the salon - he performs a technique called baliage that's all over Europe and originated in France. Instead of foils, it involves meticulously painting individual pieces. Anyway, I'm always nervous when I go blonde and I don't know why. I'm always the client that goes in and says "I want to look natural, sunkissed really," but Edward told me to vamp it up for summer. Okay.

So I did. And I'm loving the color. He did leave the bottom layers alone so my original color is in place, which, by the way, I am quite proud of because apparently my base color is perfection. I'm nervous about my roots growing in but when I return home to Texas in July I fully intend on going to see my precious Jenna to turn me back into my old self. I just don't see myself as a full on "blonde." I'm having issues dealing with it. Anyway, the color is beautiful and looks good so I can't really complain right now.

I guess I should get into some deets of my life.

Is good... been at the salon a lot since my bosses are both in Hawaii. Boo. The good part? Getting more tips and hanging out with Katie, my awesome co-worker! The bad? Having to deal with my other co-worker. Ugh. I swear, I'm going to be a millionaire pretty soon soley on the basis that I have common sense, know how to work a computer, can run a credit card machine and have excellent communication skills. Oh yeah, and I'm not neurotic (not really, anyway). I'm also planning on hitting it big by creating a solution that immediately removes airbrush tan. It's ridiculous how long this stuff adheres to your skin. I look like I have leprosy right now!!! And my base tan from home is long gone so I am in desperate need of some sun or a tanning bed.

By the way, I'd also probably be a millionaire if I opened a tanning salon out here. Do you know how much they charge?! For a month of tanning, it's around the likes of $110, but it's not unlimited - it's like 20 tans. If I busted out a salon that was $60 a month unlimited, I'd be a gazillionaire. I should probably look into it.

Last night the roommates and I had a housewarming party! It was pretty fun. The theme was reality television, so we had the newly debuted "Realitinis," took polaroids for the ANTM competition and had a video cam set up in the bathroom for confessionals. Oh yeah, and somehow I was deemed the Bachelorette (although I'm not single) and was in charge of giving out the infamous roses for the rose ceremony. There was no method to the madness. I was giving them away rapidly. But it was still a blast! After a late night Skype sesh with Stewart (who was dancing to Lady Gaga in Kanye glasses and a sombrero...) I called it a night. And thanks to my Mother who created this wonderful punch for me back in the day - it was great for the "Realitinis" and you could barely taste the vodka in them which was probably not the best thing. But it was a hit and I think you for that wonderful beverage.

It's Father's Day in case you people are living under a rock, so call your Dad, tell him "thank you" for putting up with your teenage shenanigans (we all had them), sending you to school, not killing the terrors you now refer to as ex-boyfriends*, and being the mediator when you and your Mom get into squabbles - my Dad is, at least - and then tell him you love him. Think of a funny memory you two have together. I will always remember how my Dad would sing about the "Easter Chicken" and his rendition of "Every light in the house is on, but nobody cares because Daddy pays the bills around here" in a valient effort to get my brother and myself to conserve energy. Or when I went through a period in third grade when I refused to brush my teeth and my dad told me he didn't brush his teeth for 13 years and had to get all new fake teeth and the teeth I saw were all veneers. I believed that until I was 18 years old, thank you very much. I will remember when he sent me chocolate covered strawberries for Valentine's Day my sophomore year of college because he sent them to my mom and didn't want to leave me out and when he took me all around Disney World when I was six via his shoulders (lest not forget that on that same trip you ripped my tooth-from-hell out of my mouth while Mom restrained me). Dad, you can't deny the fact that you get REALLY into Dancing With the Stars and I think that is awesome. I've said it before, but I'll buy you a motorcycle when I get successful. I predict that will happen within the next 1 - 10 years. ;) Love you very much baby Dadis.

If your Dad isn't around, say a little prayer thanking him for the time he spent in your life. He'll hear it!

Gotta get my airbrush on. Have a great Sunday!

*Subject to the boyfriend(s) being referred to

Jun 19, 2009

From Good to Glorious

Happy Friday! Hope you all are getting through the workday as fast as possible. I just got to work, actually, about an hour ago. Oh airbrush tanning. I will tell my kids about the days I had to spray down nude people for tips.

Tomorrow night is our big house warming party. I'm really psyched about it, as our theme is "So You Think You're America's Next Surviving Bachelor: Los Angeles." IF you can't tell, it's a reality-show themed extravaganza, complete with rose ceremonies AND confessionals (alcohol will be abundant and necessary). I decided the perfect addition to our party? A specialized drink, of course! "Realitinis" will make their debut!!! How presh is that? I want to make up a recipe for a spectacular drink with a little pizazz. Not sure what should be in it, although I think vodka is an obvious choice. Suggestions are welcome!

Anyone reading on Twitter? If so, it's Follow Friday, and you should definitely follow @RogerClemens! He hasn't tweeted much but he'll be a twitter-star in no time.

You all must have been praying for me, because this week has been absolutely gorgeous! No clouds, no rain, no nothing. Clear skies, bright sun - everything I imagined sunny California to be like! Too bad I've had to work all week... I would have loved to have laid out at some point.

This is kind of random, but I want to write a book. Yes, add it to my list of everything else I want to do. I think I'm going to comprise a few drafts and then talk to my Mom about what I need to do to get published. I don't claim to be an
acclaimed author or anything, but everyone has to start somewhere, right? I really just want to write and make people laugh, and I have some perfect stories just waiting to be released. If anyone knows what I should be doing to get myself in order regarding publishers, editors, etc., don't hesistate to e-mail me: kirbie.johnson@gmail.com.

My Chic Life


Go and read my post on Father's Day gifts!

Jun 18, 2009

I'm going to kill you.

So my roommates and I are going through this phase where we get in these moods like we're going to bring up something very serious and a little awkward to discuss and then bust out laughing and are like "GOTCHA BIOTCHES!!!"  For instance, last night:  I start listening to Val on her myspace page - her new song is AMAZING - and was about to post a tweet to follow her, when she walks in the living room, sits down and goes, "Um, Kirbie?  Can I bring up something
 that's a little awkward?" "Yeah!"  "Okay, well, when I'm home, can you not listen to my music?"

Apparently that's when the color flushed out of my face.  "Um?"

At this point Val is doubled over laughing.  Meanwhile, I have tears in my eyes and am mixed between horrified, confused and giggly.  "VAL! What the heck?!  You are terrible!"  I gave her a big smack.  

I got her back a few hours later.  "Ladies,  I think we need to make a conscious effort..." (both Ali and Val look at me with concern)  "... to respect each other."  Everyone starts to laugh.  Respect?  In 101?  Yeah right!  

Anyway you have to know that although I love movies,  I haven't seen quite a few that are considered "classics."  Top Gun?  Nope.  Sixteen candles?  A few scenes.  Let's be honest:  I grew up watching animated Disney Classics, Spice World, Carpool (with Tom Arnold), Titanic, anything with JTT (Pinnochio, Man of the House), Clueless (which, by the way, was a STRUGGLE to get my mom to purchase because the video cover had the word "sex" in the tagline), Grease and Hocus Pocus.  When Middle School hit, while everyone was watching Can't Hardly Wait and 10 Things I Hate About You (which I didn't actually see until I was a junior in high school... made for awkward school dances when all my friends were singing "I want you to want me" and I had to mouth the words in an attempt to keep up), I was busy recording on VHS Britney Spears and *NSYNC appearances and memorizing every dance move they every took on  stage.  ABC concert specials?  Check. Disney Christmas Concerts?  Check.  SNL? You know it.  Ask Stewart - I can recite any and every line from Britney's appearance on SNL (the first time when she had the animatronic moving boobs in her monologue.  She's wearing a pink minidress.  I'm not obsessed...).  "And then I set her hair on fire.  And that girl's wearing weaves now... shoot." 

So coming to LA has been a wakeup call on all I've been missing.  I finally got to see the following movies:
- 13 Going on 30 (LOVED IT.  Made me actually like Jennifer Garner)
- She's the Man (hysterical.  Amanda Bynes as a man resembles a mix of mi amor Zac Efron and Ellen Degeneres)
- Can't Hardly Wait
- Harry Potter and Sorcerer's Stone

Now, the last title might have caught your eye.  I am sorry to admit this, but I haven't ever read a Harry Potter book.  I've never seen any of the movies.  Apparently I've been missing out.  But it never interested me.  I figured it was a bunch of english kids living in a fantasy land wearing weird witch hats and flying on brooms.  It wasn't until last night that I started talking to Val about her future that I got a little interested in HP.  I started learning how to draw clothes and the female body via the internet because I always have these visions of costumes in my head for different artists for their songs and music videos and decided it was time to learn to how to construct and implement my vision.  Once I did that I started drawing rompers for Katy Perry and innocently asked Val if she'd wear one. 

"What will you wear?"

From there we got off on a tangent about what her concert would be like and what she envisioned.  I started sketching.  Then she stopped me - "I think you'd really benefit from watching Harry Potter.  I kind of want to be a female Harry Potter."  Okay.  Fair enough.  

So I have to hand it to J.K. Rowling,  I already fell in love with little Harry within the first 10 minutes.  I really want to read the books and then see the movies but I have a lot of catching up to do before the sixth movie comes out!!! 

Jun 17, 2009

Ring-around Downtown LA

Today I got a scenic view of Los Angeles.  I should know better to volunteer for errands because inevitably I will ALWAYS get delayed and then I feel like a failure for not getting around speedily enough.  For instance, today the Lakers celebrated their championship win, so I'm pretty sure that it was necessary that a) all cops were out in full force and b) every road was blocked, detoured and unable to get through.  I had to park about seven blocks away from where I needed to be and let me tell ya, my dogs were barking.  Note to self: ALWAYS bring a pair of flats for "just in case" moments.  One thing I found today was that the officers here are actually really friendly.  I had several ask me where I was headed and brought up some casual convo.  It was refreshing!

Anyway, my mission was to find a Staples and pick up some things for the office.  Once Staples was in view, you would think I'd easily be able to get in.  Think again.  The whole thing was chain linked with no door or entrance in sight.  Um... help?  I start yelling at the security guard.  "Hi!  How do I get in?"  "Um, mam, Staples doesn't open until 3:00 today."  Oh.  Perfect.  It's 1:30.

I heard an Office Depot was in the opposite direction but quickly realize it is chained in as well (for the parade) and it wasn't open either.  Argh.  Woe is me.  What is a girl to do?!  I ended up getting Erika to send me an address of a Staples on Santa Monica so that worked out fine.  Then it was back to the office to write up some more bloggage.  I will be linking my posts frequently on here to www.mychiclife.com, so be on the lookout for that.  I have some Father's Day ideas coming atcha soon.  

Also, I'm considering getting my own website so I can add features like my resume, portfolio designs, vCard and other necessary items - along with a blog.  Does anyone have a website host they recommend?  I had some kind of mishap with Weebly.com so unless it gets fixed soon I won't be using them.  Suggestions and comments are always welcome!


It's all Lies and that's the Truth

I feel a strong connection with Bernie Brillstein.  I don't know much about him, he's already deceased; most of you won't know him on a name-basis, but to me the man is a mentor.  Bernie worked at William Morris Agency before starting his own entertainment company, Brillstein-Grey Entertainment; he is also pinned with creating shows like The Muppets, Hee Haw, SNL and representing talent like Jim Belushi and Jim Henson (may he rest in peace).

His book that I'm currently reading on my Kindle (I'm obsessed with it and books on entertainment) is the name of this blog post and it was the best purchase I ever made.  It talks about the industry and how you don't have to be rude, spiteful, manipulative or backstabbing to succeed here in Hollywood - which is PERFECT because my whole goal is to help talent succeed without having to be a malicious, terrible, greedy and money-hungry agent.  I want to help.  I want to bring some "goodness" to entertainment.  I want to help them make the big bucks and lead my talent in the right direction.  I want to tell them what they need to hear, what is real and what is true.  And his book discusses many of these things, how he accomplished them, and how I can too.  He brings up the fear every 20-something has: will I always be this poor?  He states that being successful isn't a result of being rich, but that being rich is a gift to being successful in this business - but that people who really have value and talent do what they love and then reap the benefits.  There is no other motive.  It just so happens that he brings up a person close to my heart:

"Why does Roger Clemens pitch in his forties?  Sure, the money is good, but pitching is his identity."  (2006)

It made me feel complete reading that.  I was meant to read this book.  And somehow, someway, me and Bernie Brillstein are connected, even if it is within that one thought, that one chapter of the book.  It reaffirmed why I decided to move here.  It's hard when you're homesick and missing stability to see the light through the fog.  But it's a whole new reminder that I left my home (and my heart) in Texas to pursue my passion here in LA.  I could have stayed in Dallas and had a great life with a great job and life would have gone on and been dandy.  But my passion is out here.  One of these days my positivity, determination, ambition will pay off and allow me to help other people out.  Because honestly, if I don't help them then they're probably not going to get anywhere.  They need a stable, driving force to help them out.  "Them" being the talent, of course.  

Please pray for me and my endeavors here in the hills.  I ask that you all help my mind to be sound and heart to be healed.  I know I'm here for a reason, but this transition has been a lot harder than I expected!  Nothing good comes without struggle, right?

Hope you all are getting through any hardships or struggles right now!  I am praying for you all. And when things get tough, remember: 'Jim Henson started with a green felt frog.'

Jun 16, 2009

Wisdom Removal

Hi everyone!

So today has been eventful for many reasons.  Today at Chic was fun - Erika and I worked on a lot.  I had to call Jack Daniels regarding sponsorships, looked up wedding venues and followed up on some band quotes.  I also learned we're putting on a movie premiere next week!  How exciting!  Erika also got me a contact for a second job - she's pretty much amazing!  

I decided to call my Dentist while wandering around downtown trying to find an InStyle Wedding issue - check it out because Chic is featured!!! Page 179.  Awesome. - because I noticed a tooth protruding my gums.  I thought it might be a molar because I had all of my wisdom teeth removed except for one (allegedly).  Turns out I only had ONE removed!!! So I had to call my Mom and figure out when I was going to get my other three out.  I am coming to Dallas in July to see my BABIS so I didn't want to spend the whole time on bed rest.  So there's a good chance I'll be extending my stay in Texas.  Why not get them removed here?  Well, I'd have to pay out of pocket and girlfriend does NOT have money to do that right now. 

The roomies and I are throwing an apartment-warming party on Saturday!  So excited!  LA followers, you'll be getting a facebook invite soon.  I am excited to announce as well that I'm staying with Val and Ali until an undisclosed date/time because they officially asked me to stay longer than my three month trial period.  That takes a load off of me worrying about where I would live come September.  I'm in the process of trying to find a full-size bed... possibly lofted OR a full-size mattress/frame and a twin-size loft (no mattress needed) so Val and I can arrange our room effectively.  Craigslist has been my new bff!

Lastly, I have to give a shout out to my little bro!  He has been kicking some butt with baseball (so I hear) - so proud of you Nick!  You'll be in the pros before we know it!  Remember your big sister who loves you when you're famous!!!! 

Thanks for the comments, by the way.  I love it when people respond!


Jun 14, 2009

Susie Homemaker

Why hello there darlings!  How is your weekend?  Mine has been slightly uneventful. Besides work, I've been using a lot of my spare time to work on my fitness, clean the apartment and bake.  Yes, bake.  Tonight's treats were angel food cupcakes with buttercream frosting.  I blended pureed strawberries into the icing and garnished with a strawberry as well. Mmm mm good.  Meanwhile my boyfriend is hammered in Dallas and he keeps calling me to tell me he loves me.  Can't complain there!

Val and I are watching Degrassi and randomly she gets up and goes to her piano and starts playing something that sounds familiar.  Oh wait, it is, because it's the Degrassi theme music they play when someone is in trouble/pensive/upset/distraught.  Haha.  She just got up and started playing it!  We had a good laugh and decided life would be so much more dramatic if we had theme music playing at any given moment.

I have to say there isn't anything great to report right now.  I'm slightly terrified of how long I'll be able to survive out here.  I'm actively looking for a place to live/roommates come August in the event that I need to move out of this apartment, but you can't really do anything until you're absolutely ready to move.  I'm also probably going to pick up a second job to help with money because I am nervous I won't be able to live out here.  I've gotten a little melancholy lately thinking about family and friends.  The weather here as been miserable and I'm seriously ready for some sun and a day at the beach.  If I were in Texas I could have gone to the pool every weekend thus far, argh.  I also miss the feel of Texas in the summer.  It's different here.  I think I am most homesick because I miss my friends and my social circle that I was so connected to.  I always had something to do, something fun to engage myself with or friends that were a comfort to be around.  I'm sure once I establish a larger group of friends I'll feel more at home, but right now I feel a little out of the loop.  

I'm going to brush my teeth and hit the sack!  Night and thanks for reading.

Jun 9, 2009

There's a Party in Your Bedroom

First of all, thanks to everyone who has been keeping up with my blog.  Do me a huge favor and FOLLOW me because that would be amazing to see who my audience actually is!  Second, the title of this post is a song I can't get off repeat - it's by Cash Cash.  A great little diddy.

So what's been going on?  Well, I've been getting a lot more hours at Sunless Studio, which equals more tips and more exposure and networking opps. For instance, today I did several tans for models and the first one started asking me where I was from, what I wanted to do, etc. (a lot of people tend to chat when they're nervous about being naked).  I let her know my aspirations and she immediately offered to help.  I had no idea that all of the major talent agencies were about a block away from my work in the Bev - CAA, Endeavor, William Morris (they latter two are merging) and so on.  She gave me some tips and what I need to do to get the ball rolling.  From there a co-worker overhead and told me her friend was the producer for Larry King (weird!?) and that she would set me up with her so we could make contact and I could possibly battle it out for an assistant position.  Good things!

I honestly don't care what I'm doing - everyone always asks me "what field do you want to go into?" And seriously, I'll take anything.  You can't be picky out here.  I've learned in my short life that all roads lead somewhere, but you can't get anywhere if you don't take opportunities.  So whether it's music, TV, film, talent, production, studio - whatever - I'll do it!  I hope that I can land an assistant or trainee position in hopes to become a producer, manager or agent.  Keep the positivity coming my way!  I truly appreciate everyone's support.

Last night was pretty fun.  I went to Les Deux for the first time for Rock Monday.  Megan, the manager of the Kevin Josephson salon, invited me and the other SS girls to her boyfriend's band's video release party which just so happened to be there.  I thought it sounded fun so we all met at Megan's and then took a limo to the club (there were like 20 of us) and had a little bubbly on the way.  Little did we know that Megan and her bf are being shot for a potential reality show that MTV might pick up so the whole time we were being filmed.  It was bizarre but fun.  The band was pretty good.  They're called Love She Wrote and you should check them out.

We happened to see Ron Jeremy at the club and wooooooooooooooooof is all I have to say.  I cannot believe actual human beings sleep with him!  He was polite and nice which was more than I gave him credit for because I expected him to make a few vulgar comments and peace out.  

I have a running list of things I'm wanting to do out here.  I'll let you know how each turns out:

  • Go to Disneyland
  • See 3EB out here
  • View a taping of Ellen/Chelsea Lately
  • Visit the Paramount lot
  • Visit the WB lot
  • See Conan
  • Go to the beach (STILL haven't been)
  • Hit up Universal Studios
  • Attend a movie premiere (and I'm not talking standing outside)
That's all I can think up for now.  Please pray that it gets above 75 degrees here soon because I can't handle June Gloom any longer... it's going to be June "Kirbie drives back to Texas" if girlfriend doesn't see some sun soon.  Also, be praying for Euna Lee and Laura Ling - we as Americans need to do something about this!

Rainbows & Lollypops,

Jun 5, 2009

"Coffee with creamer - it's for Larry."

This week has been eye-opening and fabulous.   Why?  Well...

a) My internship ROCKS.  The girls are hysterical and the position itself is creative, non-restrictive, fun, and allows me to explore LA while learning the ropes of event planning. Score!
b)  In addition to free airbrush tans at work, I get free hair color and cuts!!!  Can you hear the angels singing?  I can.  Hallejuliah!  My bank account is skipping around with bunnies under a rainbow right now.
c) The people here are exceeding my expectations.  For instance, today, when it would be very easy for the fashion show stylists and coordinators to have a mental breakdown and bust out the z-shaped snap during a diva moment, they were all calm, cool & collected; polished and poised.  Nobody was upset.  Nobody freaked out.  Everyone was polite and gracious.  It was refreshing!  

That's not to say everyone is nice, or humble, or self-indulgent.  Take Exhibit A:
When: Yesterday
Where: the tanning studio (work)
Setting: Me getting airbrushed by new employee and friend, Katie.  A woman who I will only identify as "model" is assisting in the airbrushing because she has just graduated from airbrush training.  Model is approximately 5'10'' and a size 00.  
The scoop: I'm standing to my side getting airbrushed.  The model and Katie are both carefully examining my side to make sure the application is even and to help Katie identify anything she may be missing.  Then I had the ultimate Bridget Jones moment.  It went a little something liiiiiike...

Model: Okay Katie that looks good.
Katie: Thanks!
M: But on heavier people, you need to go over their legs more.  It helps them to appear skinnier.
Long, awkward silence.  I'm starting to turn red.  I can tell Katie is uncomfortable.
M:  Not that you're heavy, Kirbie. (whispers to Katie) But really, go over her legs again. 

Look, I'm not a size zero.  I've never been that small ever.  I don't want to be that small either.  Sure, I'd like to lose 5 - 10 pounds but nobody ever needs to hear that.  I think the thing I was most shocked about was that it appears as that is the mentality here - that someone my size is heavy?  I always thought it was something glamorized in movies and magazines - being a waif - but it really is a solid lifestyle here.  I've seen people only drink green tea all day.  For me, I'd rather work out than give up food.  It's just the way I am.  But anyway, it pissed me off but didn't get me too down because frankly I don't give a damn.

Friday was long but fabulous.  I got up at 4:30 to get ready to be at the office by 6:00.  We did some last minute preparations and made our way to the Bev Wilshire, which looked immaculate with all of the tables out and the runway up.  Time seemed to pass quickly because before I knew it I was done sorting and alphabetizing 750 guest name tags and getting ready to dress the models backstage for the fashion show.  It was like a bunch of wild animals running around in a cramped backstage area during the show, with coordinators calling for different models to hit their cues and makeup artists waiting at the entrance to fix and primp the girls before they hit the runaway.  I was dressing a model  who was literally 6'0'' tall and drop dead gorgeous.  She wasn't too friendly though.  I'd be reaching to take off her shoes and before I could get down she'd say "shoes. jacket. pants. sunglasses." It was a little taste of the diva lifestyle, but nothing I can't handle.  A recognizable face that was there was Saleisha, the winner of cycle 9 of America's Next Top Model.  

She was beautiful and fun and didn't take herself too seriously.  She was also extremely professional.  Go Saliesha!

After the show we were busy trying to get all of the fabulous designers clothes off stage.  Once that task was completed, I walked over to the feeding station to grab some coffee when I saw the other assistant, Erica, frantically trying to layer cream cheese on a bagel.  "Could you make a coffee please?  With cream, not milk, and Sweet 'n' Low."  Okay.  Sure.  I start to make it and there aren't any lids for the cup.  I pour it into a glass mug.  "By the way," she says, "it's for Larry King."  

Oh, no big deal.  He apparently had just waltzed by me but I didn't even notice because I was running around with a cart of clothes.  The coffee was then delivered to him and the only thing missing were napkins, which, go figure, were no where to be found.  Cue me and Erica running around backstage, attempting to find an outlet to the kitchen so we could get a few paper napkins for Larry.  

Larry was rather grumpy because the show was running a little behind, but once he got on stage to present the award to Lisa Ling he seemed to calm down and was a crowd favorite.  I might have this wrong, but I think Larry replaced Justin Timberlake last minute (right? wrong? whatever) so all I could think about was what if JT had been sitting backstage around three feet away from me instead of The King?! I guess the real question is what WOULDN'T I have done?!   Anyway, I observed Larry and the only way he resembled Justin would have to be his Nike socks (pulled halfway up his leg almost) and his Nike kicks, which he was wearing in coordination with a nice jacket and jeans.  So stylish you are, Mr. King!  You gotta hand it to him, at least he wasn't wearing suspenders or something.  I also noticed that when calling people he was dialing actual numbers instead of going through a phone book.  It's rare that anyone memorizes a phone number these days - heck, I don't even know my boyfriend's phone number by heart!  Sorry Stu.

I also got to see Lacey Chabert (Party of Five, Mean Girls) and Tori Spelling - Erika said she was a doll and I'm not surprised!  Other people there were Vanessa Minnillo (no Nick, boo), Stacie Keibler,  there was a nametag for a "Jennifer Hudson" but I don't know if it was the celebrity one or not, Marcia Cross, Lisa Ling, and several others.  It was a really wonderful event for a great organization.  Check out the Step Up Women's Network - I want to volunteer now! www.suwn.com

All in all it was a long day but eventful and I learned a lot: 
Don't run, ever.  It freaks the clients out and screams "problem!!!"  
Anything can happen.  Improvise and be quick.
Things change.  Go with it. 

It was a great weekend as well.  I worked which some people might loathe but I seriously love to work.  Makes me feel accomplished.  Saturday night I saw The Hangover and hysterical would be an understatement, although I have to say half the time I was saying "watch the baby!!!!"   Please go see it.  It was a great movie and now I'm dying to go to Vegas, yet frankly terrified for Stu and his friends when they go in August because honestly - you boys know I love you - they're all hooligans and the things I have seen happen with that group has been insane.

For instance, it was week one of Stewart and I dating when after party-hardying at Black Friar we took a cab back to the apartment only to see a car that ran INTO a stage in the middle of Addison Circle.  Turns out that car was one of Stu's friends and he decided the best idea would be to haul serious ass in order to avoid the cops.  Meanwhile the other guys were all searching for him and later they had me make Mac 'n' Cheese with spray butter. When asked about why the driver of the wrecked car was driving in the first place (he was clearly drunk AND had been put in a cab prior to this escapade), he said he was just going home to make out with a girl.  Totally legitimate, right?

Therefore, I wouldn't put it past them to pull off some of the shenanigans from the movie.  And if Boss is going on this field trip, I truly fear what kind of illegal activity might take place.  You boys know I say this all in the most loving way - you make my life way more entertaining and I wish all the time we all could be together again soon. :) 

Anyway that's it for now.  I'm off to bed.  

Jun 1, 2009


Well most of you know I've been homesick, but today totally made up for it.  I started my "assistantship" as I like to call it for Chic Events and man was it busy!  I got up early so I could meet Rachel and Erika at The Beverly Wilshire Hotel.  I felt totally like Julia Roberts driving down Rodeo and then valeting my car at the hotel.  It's so immaculate and beautiful that I feel like anyone would feel inadequate there.  But still I felt comfortable and loved the whole atmosphere - it was truly amazing.  
We started the day by doing a walk-through for our event on Friday in the ballroom.  It's just as beautiful as the rest of the hotel.  I really got to dive right in and learn about event planning by hearing everything that needs to be considered and what all will be going on.  The event is for the Step Up Women's Network and Chic has been doing the event for I believe three years now (maybe four?), so they have a lot of great relationships with the hotel and SUWM.  Everyone is super friendly from both sides of the event so it made me feel a lot more comfortable on my first day.
I knew celebrities would be there, but I wasn't sure which ones.  Turns out Lisa Ling and Marcia Cross are among those being recognized!  That should be exciting!  The best part was when Rachel goes, "Okay, so is Justin going to be presenting?"  My heart immediately started beating faster.  "No, I think Larry King will be doing that award..."
Justin WHO?!  I had to know, but not that very second, because duh,  I don't want to look like I'm a crazed fan or anything.  "Aw man.  I was hoping he'd be there.  At least Tori and Dean will be!"  Tori... Spelling? Check!  I'm pretty stoked about seeing her.  
After getting back to the office I decided to ask Erika the only thing on my mind: "So, when you say Justin, do you mean...?"  "JT? Oh yeah."
AH!  If only he would be there.  But he won't.  Fate dodges us again... maybe next time.

I couldn't be more excited to wake up at 6:00 am on Friday.  I am really excited for my life now in general just because Rachel & Erika are hilarious.  Speaking of, today around noon the CRAZIEST thing happened!!!  It was so mentally insane.  We heard a bunch of yelling down below (we're on the 9th floor) - a lot of cursing and screaming by a woman.  So Rachel looks down and is like oh, wonder what happened... OH MY GOD!!! So instantly Erika and I rush to the window to see a bike laying in the middle of the street and a bunch of stalled cars while a small white kid and black man and woman are causing a riot in the street. 

"Okay you guys, I need you to understand what just happened!!!  That (black) guy just picked the (white) guy up and slammed his head into a MOVING VEHICLE!"  Um what?! Based on the yelling, we semi-figured out the story:  the white kid was riding his bike and managed to hit the black lady's car and tore off her driver's side mirror.  And sidenote-  I'm not racist by saying "black" or issuing their race - it just gets difficult to identify who is who in this story.  Anyway, the woman freaked out and got out of the car in slippers, carrying a baton, yelling at anyone and everyone in the middle of the street, holding up all kinds of traffic.  I guess her man-friend didn't like this so he decides to try to kill this kid by throwing him into a moving car.  Luckily the kid had a helmet or something because next thing you know he's up and moving around and then rides off on his bike while the woman is still causing a huge scene.  She was yelling at the bike cop and people in the stalled cars behind her.  Then within 30 seconds of this uproar cop cars stroll up and all of a sudden she isn't yelling anymore.  So she's explaining to the police about her mirror when HELLO?!  That kid on the bike almost had his head ripped off - he was physically THROWN into a moving car! What the hell?! Strangest crap goes on here.  

Anyway, after my fantabulous (yet terrifying) first day of work, I decided to go with my gut and drive over to The Proposal premiere.  I figured it would be fun and if anything we might get to see a few of my favorite actors.  So Ali and I meet up and just kind of stand around for awhile when Sandra Bullock pulls up.  She looks really pretty and is on the other side of the street taking photos and giving autographs.  Woe is me... wouldn't it be nice if we were on that side of the street.  Except NOT because then she crossed traffic and walked over to our side!!!! I was so excited because I wasn't expecting anything like that to go on.  She was totally nice and funny and signed about a million autographs.  I didn't get one but got a bunch of a pics of her and she is just fabulous.  You rock, Sandra Bullock.

Before we knew it Ryan Reynolds showed up and all the women went nuts.  Completely nuts!  You know how he looks so hard and masculine in some photos?  Well he's not.  He's tall but has really skinny legs and a built upper body (like Stewart - love you babis!  You'd make truly a hot actor haha).  
I've learned during my short life that most celebrities are a lot shorter and not as exhilarating as you would think.  But I was thrilled regardless because duh, I love this stuff!  So Ryan does the same thing as Sandra and walks across the street to us.  I mean, women were going insane. It was unbelievable.  ScarJo was nowhere to be seen which I assume was a PR move because nobody wants to see Ryan's hot ass with his wife's hot ass.  Anyway, he walked over and I still have nothing to get autographed and dangit, I wanted one!  So while everyone is holding out their autograph books I decided to sink to an all-time low and stuck out my arm.  He gets to me, stops, looks me in the eye and says, "Really?"  And I'm like "Yeah... I don't have anything else!"  (cue his million dollar smile) "Okay fine.  Here you go."

And that was my experience with Ryan Reynolds.  I might not be proud of it but I mean it makes a great story, right?  I'm not really down with autographs in the first place because I feel like it's just a signature, but we were at a movie premiere and when the celebrities are offering themselves up for pics and autographs then why not let my inner 13-year-old come out to play?!

We also got to see Angela & Kevin from The Office as well as Elizabeth Banks!  They strolled in pretty late without all of the paparazzi craziness.  Overall it was a fun-filled day!  

Off to beddy-bye.  Visiting with the familia tomorrow!
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