Aug 26, 2009

I get so emotional, baby

This post is not as lighthearted as the previous four...

I have to admit, I'm in a very inspiring environment. LA is a city where talent runs rampant, or at least that's the facade it wants to project. However, my roommates are truly amazing. A, the actress, is doing marvelous things with her acting studio and I'm sure things will take off for her soon. V & I went to see her play and within the first five minutes she had my stomach sick (a good thing); she's going to be the next Meryl Streep. V started a duo, DanteValentina. They're a little indie, a lot of accoustic. It's a great match. I feel like I'm living in Juno or something because every time I walk into the house I hear a guitar strumming or a piano playing. It's very inviting and a great soundtrack for my writing.

I've grown up with very supportive parents, friends who are hopeful and for the past year I've had a very enthusiastic, caring and applauding boyfriend. Funny to think I have all of this now - I was the girl who was called "Moose Lady" in elementary school. I had mean girls say mean things about me to make other girls not want to be my friends- earth shattering for someone in fourth grade; in middle school I had a "friend" tell me she bought things with "money, something you don't have." I never had a date to Homecoming, an event only surpassed by prop at my high school. Not once did I ever receive a mum to hang on my top at the football game. I'm sure this sounds like a sob story, but it's not. The point is that I might have been called "Moose lady" for having a big nose, but my parents always told me I was beautiful (I have the same one). They always provided for me (as did the rest of my family), so when I called my mom crying about wanting to come home after the "you have no money" incident, she drove up to the school and in front of everyone, in particular that girl, and gave me $100 so I could buy myself and anyone else I wanted drinks from the vending machine. And although I never had a date to homecoming and never received a mum from a boy, my mom always made sure I had one hanging on my wall (with Kirbie spelled correctly). Not to mention not having a date allowed my 13-year-old mind to be open to flying to NYC city for the week to unexpectedly be in the Yankees' Ticker Tape Parade, meet Clint Black, Yogi Berra, Derek Jeter and my favs Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick.

It's funny how things work themselves out you know? I have remember things like that anytime I get a little low out here - trust me, it's been a lot harder on my psyche than I had assumed! However I know if one thing is happening to me, it's opening the door for another.


1 comment:

Janet said...

My "pretty girl" boy how that blog brought back some "teary" memories. But also some good feelings as I never wanted to have kids because I thought I wouldn't be a good parent, but maybe I did do a few things right in your eyes! LOL!

I remember all that stuff and at the time it made me mad because growing up, me and my siblings (your Aunts and Uncles) struggled through those same things, people judging us because of our financial status in life.

But your Mima always told me that we are not defined by our financial situation, but by our ability to rise above it.

Don't you worry anymore about anything! YOU are one of the best people I know and I am so proud to say you are my precious beautiful kind and talented daughter!

All things work together for good with God. HE knows who YOU are and lies in wait to bless you when you learn what you need to know to handle those blessings. (Trust me, he gave me you...and Nick at just the right time!) :)

These struggles, the mean things people say, things people do to try and hold you back...those things breed DETERMINATION.And You can't teach that. Just keep the blinders and ear muffs on and keep forging ahead!

Someday, you may have to thank all those mean and insecure people, with a big smile on your face, for helping you be more successful in life, love and relationships than they will ever know. And I personally CANNOT wait for that day!

Dad and I could not be PROUDER of you! We are about to BURST! :)))

TOUGH ALL DAY BABY!

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