Jul 27, 2010

Earth to Kourtney Kardashian

I might be going out on a limb here, Kourt, but you may have chosen the wrong guy to have sex with.

I'm not saying your baby isn't adorable.  He's a total peach.  But Scott Dipshit Dipstick  Disick is a real piece of work.  I know that TV manipulates situations for the benefit of the viewing audience, but COME ON KOURTNEY.  Don't be afraid to be a single mom (just don't read my previous post on motherhood).  Hell, I'd rather be the last person on the planet raising a kid alone than have Scott as my kid's father.

Seriously, how old are you, Scott?  Wikipedia confirms that you're 27, so I don't feel like it's inappropriate to say that it's time for you to get your priorities straight.  Any woman will tell you that when they see guys in their late 20s (30s, 40s) binge drinking and acting like a freshman in college, it's a turn off.  Don't get me wrong, I'm all about being forever young, partying and having a ton of fun.  I've had my fair share of crazy nights and I'm sure I'll have more to come, regardless of my age.  It's when it gets excessive that it gets to be more of a "he needs to get his shit together" type of thing than a "look how awesome he is!" type of thing.  And Scott, we need you to get your shit together.

More importantly, you have a kid and you're out binge drinking and staying out until 5:00, 6:00 in the morning... and that's ridiculous for any grown adult, man or woman -- ESPECIALLY SOMEONE WITH A KID!  This isn't the Greek, Scott.  It makes me wonder where your careers goals are, and if you have any, what they might be.  How you suspect you're going to really enrich your life and your child's life while you're out taking shots all hours of the night and then spending the next day sleeping it off or feeling like crap.

I'm not saying you can't have fun, but just because you aren't married doesn't eliminate the fact that you are somebody's father.  If I knew that my dad was out partying until 6:00 a.m. when I was first born, I think I'd have little to no respect for him.  What's worse is that all of this is on tape for little Mason to watch when he gets older.  I wouldn't be shocked if his first word was "Patron."

But Kourtney, while you may not be able to change Scott, you can change the situation by getting out of it... like two years ago.

Trust me, Kourt, you can do better.  Khloe landed a Laker.  Kim is dating a Cowboy.  Maybe you can find yourself a baseball player?  I can give you some recommendations.  Don't sell yourself short.

Love,

Everyone in the entire free world

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