Jan 31, 2011

Bachelor Week Five Recap

So much happened this episode... it was long!  Lots of commentary.
  • I wish I had Chris Harrison to come in my living room when my relationship was "about to get serious." I also wish when things were about to get serious I'd get whisked away to Vegas.  Blackjack anyone?
  • These girls are too thrilled about going to Sin City.  I think some of them (delusion-ally) hope they'll head over to the Little Chapel of Love and get hitched.  <----   AH!  Alli literally just said that.  Haha.
  • I think Shawntel N. is really pretty.  She's tiny.  She looks AMAZING.  I can't believe Brad took her on a shopping spree!  Don't lie, any girl would love that.  Just the other day I was thinking, "I'd love to go to a mall and buy whatever I wanted."  So jealous.  I'm totally digging Brad's collared shirt/vest combo.  
  • Bahahah "I really, really, really wish I had the one-on-one date with Brad." -- Michelle.  Well Michelle, don't we all?  But then again your last name is gold digger  Money.  Also, she's looking a little crystal meth-y today.  Am I right?
  • I really really like Shawntel.  I've mentioned before that I'm rather curious about death.  I know it sounds morbid, but I am.  I find it fascinating to read about.  So yeah, it's kind of bizarre she's talking to Brad about embalming on a date, but I bet you he's never done that before.  And she was so poised about it, you didn't see her as "Cray-Cray-Shawntel."  You just saw a hot chick talking about her job.
  • Soooo Ashley & Ashley are going on the 2-on-1 and everyone is emotional, except (of course) Michelle.  Because who doesn't like seeing best friends go head-to-head?  
  • The producers are major a-holes (we all know Brad didn't plan this Nascar date, or any date for that matter).  I can't even believe they did this to poor Emily.  Brad obviously has no idea, and the crew all knew Emily's late fiance was a race car driver.  
  • Brad, you're doing well on your clothing choices this episode!  Loved the purple tie on your date, love the button-up henley you're sporting at the race track.
  • This date terrifies me.  As clumsy as I am, I would lose control of the car, flip, something nuts. 
  • My heart is breaking for Emily.  She is a doll and a half and while she wasn't frowning or crying, one shot showed her like she was about to burst into tears.  Hell, I would be a basket case.  That is some heavy stuff to take on, especially if she hadn't been to a race track since.  Do these producers have no soul?  Obviously it's all for the ratings...
  • Oh LORD.  He crashed at that track?  This is depressing.  Brad's face just looks full of shame.  Poor guy, I really wish they wouldn't have put either of them in this position.
  • It's hard to believe she's 24.  This woman is my age!  Her maturity level is unreal.  She's a better woman than I am... I would not be holding myself together as well as she.  I'm really proud that she went through with racing on the track and I'm sure Ricky is looking down just so proud of her (I sound like I know her.  When the heck did I become a fan of The Bachelor?!).
  • Commence every woman getting jealous and pissy about Brad talking to Emily all the time.  Alli is a cold, heartless witch now because of her insensitivity to Emily.  I get it, Brad keeps talking to Emily.  But it's appropriate.  Chantal O., for the love.  She's officially been deemed "the cryer."  And she's needy.  Perrrrrrrrfect, that's what every guy loves...
  • Michelle keeps striking out.  She always is talking about the other girls.  Listen lady: why don't you spend your time trying to convince Brad you're not a nutcase instead of bashing everyone else.  *Well, that might be one way to convince him.  She's laying one on him and he's loving it.  
  • How could you not love Emily?  She's gorgeous, sweet as a peach, has her priorities in order.  Well deserved rose!
  • I can't stop thinking about Emily and her late fiance.  How terrible would it be to find the love of your life and lose him?  She can't call him if she needs, he's not there to see his baby grow up.  It's heart-wrenching.  At the risk of sounding totally cliche, don't take the ones you love for granted.
  • So Ashley and Ashley are on their date with Brad and they're vying for not only Brad's affection, but a spot in the VIVA Elvis Cirque du Soleil show.  Not going to play it down, this is an awesome date.  Except I  can't stop laughing at Brad.  He's trying to do this choreographed dance while being lifted into the air and he looks like a robot!!!
  • This is going to be awkward.  How is he going to give away this single rose?  They're BOTH sitting right there!  I except some waterworks...
  • I can't believe he kept basketcase Ashley H!!!!  How can you send home Ashley "Kiss from a Rose" S.?! YOU SANG KISS FROM A ROSE!!!
  • Brad looks terrified right now with Michelle before the rose ceremony.  AND HOW.  She's a scary woman.
Okay so the two randoms (Marissa and Lisa) got sent packing along with Ashley S.  Womp womp.  

Until next week...

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