Jan 14, 2011

Conversations with Mom

(I'm not sure if any of these guys actually live the gay lifestyle but I've heard plenty of people {aka BlindGossip} tell me they do.  And you can't date Taylor Swift and not be gay.  Point being this is all my opinion, not the gospel.)

Mom: "Wait, honey, I need you on the phone so I can remember what you said.  Kim!  Did you know that out in Hollywood, when men are gay, they set them up with these girls?  They call them beards.  And they pretend to be in a relationship?  Like Kevin Spacey and Jake Gyllenhaal and who else Kirb?"
Me;  "John Travolta."
Mom: "JOHN TRAVOLTA!"
Kim: "NO WAY!"
Mom: "YES! Tell her Kirb!"

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"Honey are you planning on taking off work for Nick's graduation?"
"Yep."
"Okay well let us know because Dad and I want to buy your trip early."
"I was going to buy it."
"Do you have money to buy it?"
"Probably not."
"Okay well let us know."
"Yeah that weekend is Memorial Day weekend, so --"
"Wait what?"
"Yeah, he graduates the 27th, that's Memorial Day Weekend."
"Wait.  Really? Well I need to check the calendar because Wings (my brother's summer ball league) starts that weekend!"

Not like the kid is doing anything important like graduating from high school!!! Gotta love Mom, her life is baseball.

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